Hyperion, Saturday Night

[demonbelthazor]

Bel didn't get sick often, especially since he picked up the nifty insta-healing powers in the Wastelands. But there were a few things that could still knock him off his feet, such as, unfortunately, the common cold. And said cold turned Bel into a whiny, cranky, miserable patient indeed.

Phoebe had gone to the store to buy a bottle of medicine for him. It was the most vile thing he had ever tasted, and living in the Underworld, he had tasted a lot of vile things. But he began to feel a little better, so he figured that more of a good thing was a better thing and chugged the whole bottle.

This could prove to be a biiiiig mistake.

Especially because his cell phone was in easy reach.


[For returned phone calls (hee) and Hyperion inhabitants, and brought to you by the fact that I am sick as a dog and high on NyQuil. NyQuil, NyQuil, NyQuil, we love you, you giant frakking Q!]

Comments

Re: Returned Calls

[demonbelthazor]

Bel answered the phone with "Do you know what it's like to fall in the mud and get kicked ... in the head ... with an iron boot? Of course you don't, no one does. It never happens. Sorry, that's a dumb question ... skip that."

Re: Returned Calls

[bridge-carson.livejournal.com]

"Uh, actually?" Bridge says. "I know what it's like to fall in the mud and get kicked in the head with a steel-toed boot, does that count?" Ranger training kind of sucked some days, you see.

Re: Returned Calls

[demonbelthazor]

"Bridge!" Bel said, recognizing the voice from somewhere in the depths of his NyQuil-induced dementia. "How did you get inside my phone?"

Re: Returned Calls

[bridge-carson.livejournal.com]

"Well," Bridge says. "It's actually very fascinating- on a "complexity per cubic inch" scale, cell phones are some of the most intricate devices people use on a daily basis. Modern digital cell phones can process millions of calculations per second in order to compress and decompress the voice stream, which is how you get me 'in' your phone."

Re: Returned Calls

[demonbelthazor]

Bel shook the phone. "How do I get you out? What if I can't? What am I going to tell Xander?" He smacked the phone few times to try to knock Bridge out of it.

Re: Returned Calls

[bridge-carson.livejournal.com]

Okaaaay, weird thunk-thunk-thunking noises coming out of the earpiece. "If I were really stuck in the phone, it'd be the work of an evil monster," Bridge points out.

Re: Returned Calls

[demonbelthazor]

"Oooh, right," Bel said, eyes wide, not that Bridge could see that. "If I vanquish him, you'll come out of the phone? Will you still be tiny?"

Re: Returned Calls

[bridge-carson.livejournal.com]

"I'm not sure," Bridge muses. "One of these days I should find out if vanquishing works on our bad guys. Usually we just fight them with our giant robot until they explode."

What? It WORKS!

Re: Returned Calls

[demonbelthazor]

"What part of the giant robot does the phone become?" Bel said dubiously. "It's a little small. But so are you."

Re: Returned Calls

[bridge-carson.livejournal.com]

"Hey now, who're you calling *small*?" Bridge frowns at the phone.

Re: Returned Calls

[demonbelthazor]

"You're in the phone!" Bel said. "The phone is small, so you must be wee to fit in the phone! I'm sure Xander still loves you even if you're small. Size doesn't matter."

Re: Returned Calls

[bridge-carson.livejournal.com]

"He'd better," Bridge says. "Even though I'm not! Small that is."

Re: Returned Calls

[demonbelthazor]

"Says the one in the phone," Bel pointed out.

Re: Returned Calls

[bridge-carson.livejournal.com]

"Here, ask him yourself!" Bridge says as Xander walks in to the room.

"It's Bel. He's claiming I'm small," he tells Xander, handing off the phone.

Re: Returned Calls

[demonbelthazor]

"Xander's in the phone with you?" Bel said, staring at it.

Re: Returned Calls

[needsaparrot]

"How are we defining small here?" is the response. "Because the one you have no way of knowing? You have no way of knowing. And no. Definitely no."

Re: Returned Calls

[demonbelthazor]

"Oh no, you're wee, too," Bel said. His phone was eating people. It had to be stopped. "How do we make you big again?"

Re: Returned Calls

[needsaparrot]

"...We don't? Bridge doesn't do threesomes. No offense."

Re: Returned Calls

[demonbelthazor]

"But I can't just sit here and let you be like this!" Bel said. "I have to do something to help."

Re: Returned Calls

[needsaparrot]

"...I'm pretty sure we can handle it on our own!"

Re: Returned Calls

[demonbelthazor]

"Well, just let me know if you need any help," Bel said. "I hate to see you guys like this!"

Re: Returned Calls

[bridge-carson.livejournal.com]

"...You can't see us," Bridge points out. "We're in the phone." He meant to say 'on', really. It's just that the 'in' kinda slipped out instead.

Re: Returned Calls

[demonbelthazor]

"You know what I mean," Bel said. "Is it OK if I keep you in my pocket until we figure this out? I don't want to drop you."

Re: Returned Calls

[bridge-carson.livejournal.com]

"No dropping," Bridge agrees. "Dropping is bad."

Re: Returned Calls

[demonbelthazor]

"Don't worry, I'll take care of you," Bel said seriously. "And I'm sure everyone else here is willing to lend a hand to help you out. Me, Anders, Phoebe, Piper, Veronica, even Angel -- we'll make you big again."